Last Sunday we continued the series, “He said, She Said.”
We continued out of last week, where we established that God created man and woman
together as the same spirit and separated them later. Our differences as male and female are merely
physical. In this second part we
discussed the role that God designed for the man. The main difference between men and women is a
hormonal difference. All children are
female in utero until about the 7th week. It is at that point that,
if the baby is to be male, testosterone floods the fetus and causes it to begin
to develop the physical characteristics of the male. It also causes the mind to
develop differently than that of a woman. As we pointed out in part one, this
is all by God’s design.
The Word tells us that we are knitted and formed on our
mother’s womb by God Himself. I believe we are created as either male of female
based on the plans and purposes God has for each person. Philippians 2:7-8 and
Hebrews 2:17 tell us that, because of His purpose, Jesus came to earth as a
man. 2 Corinthians 10:5 tells us to focus on God’s plans for His design for us. Philippians 4:6-8 echoes this.
The testosterone in man causes Him to develop with
certain pre-programmed tasks that drive him. Basic among these are the desire
to provide and protect. So, it is this purpose that causes man to develop
physically different as well as mentally different. Generally speaking, men are
a little bigger and physically stronger. They are also programmed to protect
those they love. I am personally not a
“man’s man.” I don’t have a deep drive to hun,t and I don’t involuntarily grunt
at the mention of football. However, if you come against my wife or my kids,
you will see a different side of me really quickly! It is a natural response.
Ironically, women do not receive value from men
through provision and protection. That is just our responsibility. I counsel
many couples and find that many problems come from men trying to provide and
protect, but not stopping to truly love. A perversion of purpose can create a
workaholic who thinks he is loving his family by providing more. We’ll examine
this more next week as we work into the purpose of woman.
Jesus gives us a great example of what a man is
supposed to be. We looked at Philippians 2:6 and following. He was aggressive and confrontational when He
needed to be. He had it out with the Pharisees. He rebuked when a disciple
needed rebuking. He became aggressive when men were harming His church. As a
side note, have you ever noticed that Jesus didn’t become aggressive and
confrontational with the world – only the religious zealots of His day? I
believe this is partly because those in the world were His future bride!
Jesus calmed storms at a moment’s notice. He
marched into hell and took the keys of death from the devil. He did not quit
until His job was complete (this is especially important to train boys to do as
we raise them). He was intense. But He was also full of the Spirit. This caused
Him to also be compassionate, loving and patient. You see, He showed us the
balance of manhood. Be what we were created to be, but also allow the Spirit to
balance us and make us complete. As
parents of young boys we must develop that desire in them to win and to finish
what they start. But we must not allow the desire to win to be a desire to win
at all costs. That is what the unchecked male soul will produce. Men are to be aggressive at the right time,
but not all the time or to excess. Men
are logical and task oriented by design. Women, contrary to popular belief, are
not “emotional.” Rather, they are relational. Men need to remember the
relational aspect when setting out to win and conquer. Jesus showed us that.
Finally, we men must learn to be Spiritual leaders.
It is part of what we were created to be. Ephesians 5:25-26 tells us that we
are to love our wives as Christ loved the church. The wives are not commanded
to love their husbands. God settled millions of marriage fights right there.
When neither party feels loved, it is the responsibility of the husband to love
first. We love Christ (as His bride) because He first loved us. We must also
not allow the Spiritual responsibilities in the home to fall on the wife.
Women seem more naturally “spiritual” because they
are more naturally relational – which is what our spiritual walk is all about.
But there is incredible power when man steps into His position as the priest of
the home and initiates the spiritual direction. Let your wife find you up early
in the morning reading the Word or praying and she will likely become more
attracted to you – because you are walking in your purpose. It’s time for men
to step into their God-given roles. You
may not pray like your wife prays or as long as she prays. You may be a lot
more simple and, to be honest, short. But take the initiative and do it. You
will be bringing Godly order to your home and you will see more Godly results
to go with it.